Oh how I laughed

This is seriously one of the funniest news stories I have read about the Commonwealth Games!

Funnier than large monkeys being brought in to chase away smaller monkeys, funnier than the Brits getting the sh!ts in the pool, funnier than Channel 10 deciding to send their television commentators to the 39 degrees celsius temperatures of Delhi in pale blue shirts that show even the slightest hint of perspiration.


It’s not a V for victory

WE CAME, we saw, and when we didn't conquer we flipped them the bird.

The Ugly Australian loser has descended on Delhi and for once they were not wearing cricket whites.

Indians have come to expect rudeness from our cricketers. What wasn't expected was a display of petulance from our Commonwealth Games athletes as they embark on what many believe is little more than a public relations exercise.

As the relevance of the Commonwealth Games was being questioned in past weeks, Australia's Games honcho Perry Crosswhite went so far as to call them Australia's gift to the weaker nations of the region.

A chance for us to not so much flex our ample sporting muscles as to give others less fortunate the chance to play alongside us and learn.

One thing they have learned in recent days is how to raise two fingers of the hand and wave it in the general vicinity of the judging panel. Refusing to shake hands with the victorious opponent is an optional extra.

When wrestler Hassene Fkiri went for the daily double after losing his gold medal bout on Tuesday, Australian officials acted quickly and decisively.

After debating long into the night, Crosswhite and chef de mission Steve Moneghetti chose not to send him home on the first available flying kangaroo, but to lumber him with a raft of punishments including personal apologies all round.

His actions, said Moneghetti, had been an embarrassment to himself, his family, his country and the Australian team.

We are a country that plays hard and fair, said Moneghetti, but we always accept the judge's decision. Fkiri would be made an example of.

Obviously cyclist Shane Perkins didn't get the memo.

When the judges sent him back to the end of the queue after ruling he had caused an accident in the keirin, he raised two fingers and said "Fkiri you" not once, but twice.

As Moneghetti said, hard, fair and cop it sweet.